I think it’s hard for adults to write from a child’s perspective. But that’s the challenge of today’s prompt. Who are these characters? My point of view character is the little boy.
“Give me big smiles.”
Sarah is really nice. Just as nice as Daddy said she was. I grin big as me and Tina sit on the front steps. But Tina doesn’t smile.
“Sarah said to give her big smiles,” I tell her.
Tina doesn’t listen. She just keeps staring at Daddy’s girlfriend. Tina isn’t friendly. I don’t know why.
Sarah puts down her camera and searches for something in her backpack. “I left my best lens in my car. Tina, here are my car keys. Would you get it for me? It’s in another backpack that looks almost like this one. “
Tina doesn’t move. She just stares. Then she turns around and runs into our house.
Sarah makes a funny noise and looks like she’s gonna cry.
I jump off the step and pat her hand. “Tina doesn’t like people. She likes cats, thought. She’d like you better if you were a cat.”
Very sweet idea with lots of potential! Here’s my thought:
“My story is about the time my brother caught a robber. Here’s our picture in the newspaper. It happened when we were getting ice cream from the Mr. Chill truck on Maple Street. Ian got a cone with sprinkles and I gave the Mr. Chill guy our money. Ian tapped me and said, ‘That guy just took a paper from Mr. Chill.’ I didn’t know what he was talking about, but a second later Mr. Chill hollered for his recipe. Ian said the tall guy on a bike had it. Mr. Chill got real panicky then and asked if the tall guy had glasses and spiky hair. Ian said yes and started chasing him and forgot his cone on the counter. I didn’t know what to do, but Mr. Chill shouted that his art nemesis, whatever that is, stole his secret recipe and the steaks were high, which I didn’t get because how can a steak be very high? Dad’s grill is taller than me but I wouldn’t say the steaks are high if my ice cream recipe just got stolen. After that, Mr. Chill and Ian ran right in the road and the cops came and the tall guy had to give back the recipe. Mr. Chill said Ian saved it, and since I brought Ian, I did too. Then the newspaper lady took our picture and Mr. Chill made us fresh cones.”
Wonderful! You have the voice of child down pat. I love the play on words, which is so typical of kids. It reminds me of “Bunnicula”. A dog and cat are convinced that their family’s new rabbit is a vegetarian vampire, draining the juice from fruits and vegetables every night. The cat has heard in a movie that you must drive a stake through the vampire’s heart. So when Mom leaves a steak to defrost on the counter, the cat grabs it, holds it against the rabbit’s chest, and pounds on it.
Haha, yes homophones take a while to learn! Growing up my family pastor often sprinkled in the phrase “of and by itself.” For YEARS I pondered the significance of a lone oven (oven by itself). I think this memory inspired me to write the little girl’s confusion over common phrases.
That hilarious! I imagine this oven sitting in a field somewhere. My #3 sister was confused by the Gloria Patri for years. We sang the last line “World without end. Amen Amen.” She thought it was “World without men. All men. All men.” She’d look around the sanctuary and wonder what all the men were doing there and why the church wanted a world without them.